Why Love Songs Are Rubbish.
I was in the gym the other day, looking at myself in the mir.. I mean, pushing my boundaries..
..when a strange videoclip began to play on the plasma screens.
It was a shirtless man by the name of Steelheart, singing a pop dance love song, in which he reassured me and other gym-goers that..
“I will never let you go.”.
His bold promise caught me slightly offguard.
Of course, his message was clearly aimed at the female half of the audience, but even then – when I put myself into their shoes – I wondered what’s really behind his offer.
It seemed like through his words Steelheart cast the object of his desires as a rudderless vessel which is hopelessly doomed if set free.
I can imagine that promise like this would be comforting to someone whose life is a metaphor for such a vessel.
(And look – I’m not placing any value judgment upon anyone here – I myself have been in the space where I just wanted to cling on to a woman and make that she never left me).
But really, is that the kind of life that is the limit of human potential?
Is that the most powerful that we can be?
And that’s what I’m alluding to here – wouldn’t it be more fulfilling to create the kind of live inside which we are whole and complete..
..so that we can bring a partner into that space, who is also living inside a life which is whole and complete? The result: a relationship of GIVING, of INTERDEPENDENCY, rather than NEEDING and DEPENDENCY.
Back to the love songs, though…
I’m not finished!
I was curious to find out more about what kind of listening is out there for popular songs about love. And you know what? Well, for Lenny Kravits there seems to be “ain’t no sunshine when she’s gone .. only darkness everyday”.
And then one of the Sugababes pointed out to me that “I can’t be without you”.
Then Mariah Carey made a veiled threat that “boy don’t you know you can’t escape me .. you will always be my baby”.
Christina Aguilera was much more intellectual when she observed that “everytime I see you everything starts making sense”, but I still felt like she needed me to make her happy.